Hmmm. I’ve thought about starting this blog for quite awhile, and now it seems I have nothing of interest to say! How about…Hello? Welcome to my page? Not a very auspicious start to what I’m hoping will be a place to record my thoughts, opinions, rants, successes and failures, and most importantly a chronicle of my FINAL weight loss journey.
First off, I guess I should thank my inspiration for this endeavor: Jennette Fulda, also known as PastaQueen. I recently read her book Half-Assed, and was so impressed and intrigued that I read her entire blog starting with her first entry 4 years ago. I highly recommend it – she rocks!
Soo….here we go….
I’ve gained and lost hundreds of pounds over the last 25 years, but after age 30 things seemed to just snowball out of control and now I find myself at the unthinkable weight of 251 pounds at age 40. Sigh.
What happened, I have no idea. Or I thought I had no idea. But after much soul-searching I think I’ve finally hit on the reason for all my diet failures (sadly, the solution still eludes me).
Food is my rock, my support system and my dearest friend. I know that last one sounds crazy, but hear me out. Food is the friend that always comes over on a Friday night when you don’t have plans. The friend who is always there to comfort you when you’re sad, celebrate when you’re happy or just to hang out on the weekend. The friend who never criticizes you, agrees with your every opinion, doesn’t expect anything in return and always leaves you with a warm, comfortable happy feeling.
So now I know why I’ve failed every time I’ve tried to lose weight in the past – who would voluntarily cut off all ties with someone that makes you so happy and comfortable! I mean seriously, that’s just insane! But what I’m slowly realizing is that the friend who always agrees with you and never challenges you isn’t really a friend at all. That friend doesn’t encourage you to reach outside your comfort zone and try new things and make new friends.
This is my challenge. I need to redefine my relationship with my oldest, dearest friend. How I’ll do that, I have no idea. Stay tuned…